You Look Like I Feel Shirt
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About This Shirt
Wow, you look like I feel. When I say that, I mean you look like Eleanor Roosevelt took several blows to the face with a lead pipe. When I say that, I mean you look like Mickey Rourke got into a fight with a blowtorch. When I say that you look like I feel, I mean you look like a leather belt that was put in the microwave and was then vomited on by a coked-up, boozed-out Lindsay Lohan. Actually, after this heavy night of drinking and partying with Ke$ha and Snooki at the Penthouse penthouse, I feel like a glitter-covered herpe made of burning and the sadness of a thousand orphaned puppies. That's what you look like: you look like a glitter-covered herpe made of burning and the sadness of a thousand orphaned puppies. I've done nothing but vomit after my whiskey-fueled bender last night and, darling, upon seeing you I feel better. I may have been the girl passed out in the John Barleycorn bathroom covered in piss and Taco Bell Fire Sauce, but you look like the girl who just woke up after being passed out in the John Barleycorn bathroom covered in piss and Taco Bell Fire Sauce. Please, take a shower and reclaim what remains of your dignity.
Guy's American Apparel Tee, Heather Kelly, Small
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